1. |
Home
03:22
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Fear to be alive here
no food, no rest, no peace
nothing, no family, alone!
//Streets, my home
coldness, my heart
fallen, alone
calling, no response//
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2. |
Sacrificium
03:34
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Ghosts between you
Screams under the Lord
And his blood mixed with the mud
Where is the real Judge?
Closing my life
Falling into the campfires
Don't try to kill me
//Forgotten Forever!//
Please leave that knife
I'm just a little child
Please leave that knife
//Forgotten Forever!//
Why all of you look so dark?
Don't undress my soul //Into the campfires//
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3. |
Aileen
06:02
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***All lyrics are quotes from Aileen Wuornos***
I really got tired of it all.
I wanted to clear all the lies and let the truth come out.
I have hate crawling through my system.
I really got tired of it all.
//I'm one who seriously hates human life and would kill again.
"To me, this world is nothing but evil"//
//I really got tired of it all//
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4. |
Alone
04:24
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// Waiting... I don't know,
Living!? Fuck that!
Crawling until the end!
Going down//
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5. |
In The Edge
07:25
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Interview 1
Psychiatrist: Why did you come here?
Her: because I tried to commit suicide.
Psychiatrist: How you did it?
Her: I took an overdose of those pills
Psychiatrist: 100, didn't you?
Her: 100, yes.
Psychiatrist: and why did you want to commit suicide?
Her: because I didn't want to face anything
Psychiatrist: this wasn't the first time...
Her: no
Psychiatrist: How often did you try?
Her: I tried quite a few times...
Psychiatrist: Why did you try so persistently to take your own life? ... it's a difficult question...
Her: yes, I was just desperate, and I didn't... I couldn't face...things that had come up. so I thought the easy way out to take pills, and it would be all over and that's what I did.
Lyrics
When the darkness and the light make no difference
Stopped calling, trouble thinking, there is no need to sleep
when you realized the truth that anything makes sense
stopped eating, started cutting, physical pain
When you are on the edge by looking down, you will see yourself
Interview 2
Psychiatrist: when is it worse in the morning or at night?
Her: It's worse in the morning, but it's happening now all the time, I can't seem to...
Psychiatrist: It's worse in the morning? can you sleep?
Her: No, I'm scared to go to sleep even, but I had some pills and slept last night a little bit
Psychiatrist: with pills, you can sleep?
Her: Yes, I slept a while last night with 4 pills...
Psychiatrist: and if you don't get...you say you are too scared, in what way? Are you afraid of anything in particular, or do you just feel so awful that...
Her: I feel so awful a lot of time, I just concentrated on one thing, on myself I guess, and what's happened to me, what's going to happen to me, what's....... going to go crazy, I feel. I can't seem to talk to people, I seem to be down all the time, I don't do anything, can't take any interest in life, or my family, or anybody around, I just sit there looking dumb, like a dumb person.
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6. |
Ecpati
08:22
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Reflexiono por todo aquello que hice,
y lo que no,
por el daño causado, por los pequeños logros,
miserablemente esto es lo que soy,
nunca fui suficiente
A pesar del esfuerzo en vano, jamas fui comprendido....
He decidido no despedirme...
Translation
I reflect on everything I did and what not,
for the damage caused, for the small achievements,
miserably this is what I am.
I was never enough,
despite the wasted effort, I was never understood ...
I have decided not to say goodbye ...
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7. |
In The Mirror
04:28
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Empty, scars, shame, stupid,
deception, humiliation, in vain, crap
waste, rejected, down, failed.
Empty, scars, shame, stupid,
waste, rejected, down, pain.
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8. |
Gone
06:37
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Today I feel like I am not gonna make it last so see me now dying.
This is for you, for the pain, for me, and they all fuck off You'll feel me.
I am trash, I'm shit, I am not worthy and I know all this will be my end
go fuck off yourselves, stop crying for me, this is just for me it's my decision
Have you ever thought that you are nothing?
Die! I will try it! this is no show time, hey follow me! this is not my fault again,
take my hand and we'll jump to death...
ah! it's a bit scary, it's for braves, I know, then you have to jump, follow me.
There's no love, just shit, smell my blood, finally, I'm happy, this is the end.
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9. |
Adios Definitivo
05:08
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Ya es tiempo de decir adios, definitivo,
Ya pase, por la asfixia, el no creer, las dudas, no saber que hacer,
las preguntas sin respuesta,
los recuerdos, el dolor, la furia, el rencor, la tristeza, el temor, la locura, el perdon, el silecio, la negacion, la ira, la depresion,
la pena, la aceptacion, el duelo, la afirmacion.
Ya es tiempo de decir adios, definitivo.
Translation
It's time to say goodbye, definitively.
I already passed the suffocation, not believing, doubts, not knowing what to do,
the unanswered questions,
the memories, the pain, the fury, the resentment, the sadness, the fear, the madness, the forgiveness, the silence, the denial, the anger, the depression,
grief, acceptance, mourning, affirmation.
It's time to say goodbye, definitively,
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10. |
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Well, that's not a story for someone to feel identified, those shits do not go with me, damn it! How I hate to be interrupted while I speak ... Better just shut up and listen, or in the same way, I do not care what you do I am not looking for attention, in any case, I have been ignored my whole damn life and I want to leave this letter Simply because I'm an empty bastard I just want you to know how I feel, not to feel sorry for me, I don't try to get you to help me be happy or have "beautiful moments" I just haven't been happy for a fucking moment in all of my life and I won't be now. I can't understand how they do it, how can they be so close to me and turn their back on me in my worst moments? Am i worth nothing? I do not try to hurt anyone, I have never hurt someone because I am always there for who needs me, but nobody is there for me, and for months I have been in depression, in loneliness and nobody notices any of this shit and I feel upset, I feel that I have ceased to exist and I am how you hear people say "another stone in the river", am I nothing then? I can end my life and I am sure they would feel more reassured knowing that I can no longer "bother" them with my concerns.
Anyway, I hope someone finds this and for a moment I thought that I could be something beautiful in this garbage of life.
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Ecpatia Costa Rica
Black Sorrow Metal band.
Members:
Father Damien
Karras: Composer, Vocals, Keyboards and Guitar.
The Abysmal: Drums/Backing Vocals.
Forsteri: Guitar.
Beleth: Guitar.
Seraph: Bass.
Country: Costa Rica.
Since 2020
... more
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